A Day Well Spent!

Yesterday I had the pleasure of attending a stop the bullying conference with our Interim Superintendent sponsored by Rutgers University, Upward Bound. Also in attendance were about 100 of our students along with approximately 400 other students county wide.

It started with a 7-person panel representing education, judicial, law enforcement, social services, GLSEN (Gay, Lesbian, and Straight Education Network) and LLEGO (Gay–Bisexual-Transgender Union of Rutgers University). The broad discipline and the “hue” of the panel were extraordinary, and in my opinion allowed every student in that room to feel personally invited to be a part of the conversation.

For many a detail like diversity is often ignored, overlooked and/or undervalued, sometimes unconsciously – sometimes not. For me, that sets the tone for everything else I will experience during an event. If I don’t see people who like me as an integral part of the conversation, in leadership, then I don’t feel “my” experience will be fairly represented – and at the end of the day don’t we all just want to be able to relate and be related to? This is a deeper conversation for a later time. For now – let me share the awesomeness of this well planned, well orchestrated information rich student-centric conference.

The knowledgeable panel gave very sound advice, and very specific examples of bullying and its legal implications. For example, most students (as well as many adults) think of bullying as a physical act of brutality, but in fact with the advent of social networks and text messaging this definition has taken on a whole new life. Texting insults, sexting (sexual provocative text messages or photos), posting photos without permission and sending rumors via the internet are all prosecutable under the newly constructed bullying laws in our State. The prosecutor on the panel gave the student very clear guidance as to the seriousness in which bullying is being viewed and prosecuted by our State. And although she informed them her goal was not to scare them, I think she did a pretty good and appropriate job in giving them honest information and a formal warning.

The audible gasps by the students let me know many began to rethink some of the things they may have posted, participated in, and/or commented on.

There was also a sensitivity element shared by the panelists. The widely used expression “That’s so Gay” and the very popular use of the word “Nigger” were two called out specifically. A feeling and face were put on these two verbal expressions. As I watched the emotions on the student’s faces I saw an awareness light their eyes. Certainly I don’t expect that they all got it, or that it will be eradicated, but I certainly believe the more people who become aware of how it makes people feel (thus humanizing it) the closer we become to a more caring society.

Another relevant and often overlooked part of bullying that was highlighted was with regard to the onlooker, the passerby, the passive participant. Again, in watching the student’s reactions and hearing their audible rumblings, I think they were exposed to another part of the bullying equation. One of the panelists did a demonstration that provided the students with a way to effectively manage through a bullying situation. She showed the students how to approach the “victim” and walk them away from the situation, thus diffusing it. It was practical and applicable, and was met with a rousing round of applause once the demonstration concluded.

They also had a phenomenal speaker who did a live presentation for almost 2 hours. This deserves its own post over the weekend.

The maturity and behavior of our students and all those in attendance was laudable. Not a single incident, not a profane word or a single raised voice in agitation. Our PHS and Barack students did us PROUD PLAINFIELD!